getting married
Question and Answer
Is the desire to marry a virgin legitimate?
Certainly. Excluding the issues of divorce and death of a spouse, shouldn't we all want to marry virgins? Men and women both should want that. So often we have a double standard that says men should "play around" before marriage but then marry "nice girls" who didn't. Even some "nice girls" want experienced men because they grow up hearing that men should know all about sex but women should be naive. The very terms we use to describe them reflect this mentality: men are studly; women are sleazy.
"I grieved when I found out my fianc had already had sex," shared Terry. "It's really disappointing, because I've saved myself for marriage. But he has a spirit of repentance about it. So I decided that if God has forgiven him, I can, too. I realize we may have to deal with some related difficulties in the future, but I'm willing to face that because I want him in my life."
How much importance a person places on this is an individual matter. For some, marrying a person with a "past" may not be a livable option; for others, it may be workable. When deciding on a future mate, we have to ask ourselves, "What problems am I willing to live with if my future spouse does not live up to my ideal?" (recognizing that none of us meets God's standard).
Background Information
Pundits and Poets on the Rewards of Long-term Marriage
A collection of wit and wisdom that may be just the cure for those mid-term marriage blahs.
Twelve Marriage Killers
Start your marriage off right by guarding yourselves against common pitfalls.
Questions and Answers
Is premarital counseling really necessary?
Answer
What are some realistic financial expectations for newlyweds to have for their first two or three years of marriage?
Answer
Review Frequently Asked Questions
Stories
Learning to Make Marriage Real
Here's how one newlywed is making her marriage last a lifetime.
If you've been through a experience related to this topic, we invite you to share your story with others.Share Your Story
Other Things to Consider
Talk About Misunderstanding
These few, lesser-known truths can help you and your spouse bridge the communication gap.
The Myth of Healthy, Happy Extended Families
When you marry, you become a family in more ways than one.
Your New Family
These principles can help couples have healthy relationships with in-laws — and each other.
Related Topics
Life Pressures: Working Moms, Stay-at-Home Moms
Relationships: Blended Families, Divorce, Parents and Adult Children, Caring for Elderly Parents
