adoption
Over- 50 Birthdays
As happens to all of us once a year, I'm about to celebrate another "over 50" birthday. What number it is doesn't really matter, since the years go by in a blur. What does matter is that I look at the positive side of being a year older. I'm through being stressed out about being over 50.
For one, I no longer believe that I really look as old and sick as I appear in the fluorescent lighting of public restrooms. Instead of gasping in horror when I see my image in the mirror, I just return to my table at the restaurant, calm and composed — as if I'd never seen an apparition at all! George Orwell once wrote, "At 50, everyone has the face he deserves." I don't deserve the one in the restroom, so I refuse to claim it.
Second, I'm over believing that I will one day return to the weight I was in high school. Let the younger women carry that illusion from exercise class to exercise class. I'll keep exercising, sure, but not with the intent of getting down to a size 4. I'll work at keeping fit so I can maintain good health and ensure the cobwebs don't take hold of my brain.
I'm also over (well, mostly) trying to control other people's lives, feelings or political opinions. It's a shame that 50-odd years of accumulated wisdom will have to go unshared among my grown-up kids, but I've learned that expressing what I believe is enough. Children and grandchildren can only take so much sage advice, and they must be allowed to make their own mistakes. The popular saying, "Lord, put your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth" is a good one for us in the over-50 crowd.
Most significantly, I'm over trying to maintain total control of certain areas of my life, refusing to release them to the Lord — things like my personal appearance, my health, my work, my family and relationships. In fact, all are in His hands, whether I acknowledge it or not.
You and I should make peace with the reality of getting older, "For this God is our God for ever and ever; he will be our guide even to the end" (Psalm 48:14, NIV).
Background Information
Agency Adoptions
When it is time to evaluate adoption agencies, consider these pros and cons.
Where Have All the Babies Gone?
The top reasons fewer babies are available to the growing number of couples who want to adopt.
Adopting on Your Own
This advice can help single parents who want to adopt children.
Causes and Characteristics of Attachment Disorder
For adoptive parents, attachment issues can be a huge concern.
Independent Adoption
These are the risks and rewards of adopting without the help of an agency.
Questions and Answers
Are adopted children more likely to be rebellious than children raised by biological parents?
Answer
How would you go about telling a child he or she is adopted, and when should that disclosure occur?
Answer
Review Frequently Asked Questions
Stories
Reflections on Bonding With an Adopted Child
Bonding with an adopted child can take time — and great patience.
A Second Chance at Life
Two adopted children arrived from the most unlikely of sources.
Adoption as Grace
How does enlarging your family reflect God's love?
An Act of Grace
In the midst of ethical ambiguity, one infertility treatment is a welcome development.
Climbing the Hills
A father tells his story of adopting his daughter from Russia.
If you've been through a experience related to this topic, we invite you to share your story with others.Share Your Story
Other Things to Consider
Where is God in the Midst of All My Troubles?
So many cry out to Him in times of need, but is God really listening? And, more important, does He care?
Related Topics
Life Pressures: Working Moms, Stay-at-Home Moms
Relationships: Blended Families, Divorce, Parents and Adult Children, Caring for Elderly Parents
