caring for elderly parents
Help From Hospice
The goal of hospice is to provide support and care for persons in the last phases of incurable diseases so that they may live as fully and comfortably as possible. Hospice focuses on maintaining the quality of remaining life. This program was built on the hope and belief that through appropriate care patients and their families may be free to prepare mentally and spiritually for death.
Hospice programs provide services to terminally ill patients, their families and significant others up to 24 hours a day, seven days a week, in both home and facility settings. Physical, social, emotional and spiritual care is provided by a team of caregivers. Families, professionals and volunteers work together to treat patients in the last stages of illness, attending during the dying process, and helping families during bereavement.
Patients must have a terminal diagnosis (life expectancy of less than 6 months) to receive hospice care. If the patient is able-bodied and independent, the hospice will treat the patient in the home with help from the patient"s family, if available. If the patient is unable to care for himself, the hospice will arrange for care in a hospice-operated, in-patient facility or work with a nearby nursing home for hospital on a contract basis to care for the patient. Hospices try to provide as close to a home-like setting as possible for the patient.
The hospice care approach
The primary goal of hospice care is to manage or control pain and other symptoms and to alleviate the fears most commonly associated with terminal illnesses. Most pain and symptoms can be managed in a home setting using oral medications.
Some of the fears hospice care addresses include:
- fear of pain related to the illness
- fear of becoming a burden to the family, and
- fear of financing the cost of a terminal illness
The hospice team of doctors, nurses, psychologists, spiritual counselors and volunteers provide such support services as administering medication, lending equipment, shopping, cleaning and running errands for the patient. Generally, the hospice staff can be reached 24 hours a day and will visit a patient when needed.
Availability of hospice care
Those seeking hospice care for a friend or relative can find a listing in their local telephone directory"s yellow pages. However, most people find out about a particular hospice through a friend, neighbor or family member who has been involved with hospice care. Other ways to obtain information about hospice care are through a pastor, a physician"s referral, newspaper advertisements and community club presentations (i.e., Kiwanas, Rotary, local library and others).
There are more than 3,195 hospices in the United Kingdom and more than 3,000 throughout the United States and Puerto Rico . Great Britain is now the leading country for palliative care training and treatment.
How hospice prepares the family
Hospice care does not only care for the individual, but for the family, as well. Hospice staff members and volunteers attempt to meet the needs of patients and families by:
- Addressing the physical needs of the patient, such as a hospital bed, commode chair or walker.
- Attempting to fulfill the heartfelt needs of the patient, no matter how big or small.
- Serving as go-betweens for the patient and his or her doctor.
- Teaching the family how to administer pain medications.
- Instructing the family on how to make caring for the patient a team effort.
- Encouraging the family to surround themselves with a network of support from friends and church members.
- Challenging family to reminisce and take time out for lighthearted moments with the patient.
- Urging the family members to express their true feelings about what is happening.
- Preparing the family for when the patient passes away, adjusting expectations and discussing who to call first, etc. when the time comes. This training is often a comfort to the family.
- Giving the family breaks and running errands for family or patient.
- Offering companionship to the patient.
- Helping the family plan the funeral (which volunteers and staff members often attend), sending cards and letters, and offering continuing psychological and spiritual counsel to the family for as long as needed.
The cost of hospice care
Hospice care is a very cost-effective way of caring for a terminally ill person. Hospice care is covered under Medicare, Medicaid (in some states), most private-insurance groups and HMOs. Families may be asked to meet some uncovered costs. However, hospices rarely, if ever, turn down patients for financial reasons. Public and community support through donations, grants, memorial gifts and fund-raising events assist to help cover the cost of care.
Last updated September 2004.
Background Information
Hospice: Offering Quality of Life to the End of Life
Approximately 30 years ago, a U.S. volunteer movement began that would revolutionize health care.
Advance Medical Directives
This comparison between Living Wills versus Durable Power of Attorney can help you make informed health care decisions for your aging parent.
Aging or Alzheimer's
Regular signs of growing older often get paralleled with Alzheimer's. Find out the difference.
Caregiving Support Systems
Providing for an aging parent can be stressful. It's important to be surrounded by others who can help.
Is It Alzheimer's?
If you're concerned about your loved one's mental health, here's help distinguishing normal memory loss from the onset of Alzheimer's disease.
Questions and Answers
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Answer
Review Frequently Asked Questions
Stories
Making My Mother's End-of-Life Decision
If Mom lived, would she want to be a "vegetable" the rest of her life? What if she never came out of her coma? What would she want us to end her life?
Full Circle
From child to parent, one woman reflects on caring for her mother.
The Long Goodbye
A daughter faces the harsh reality of her mother's Alzheimer's disease and the difficulty of loving the stranger her mother has become.
You Can Go Home Again
As parents reach their later years, many children feel the tug to move closer to them.
If you've been through a experience related to this topic, we invite you to share your story with others.Share Your Story
Other Things to Consider
Loneliness and Depression Afflicting the Elderly
If you know an elderly person who you suspect is clinically depressed, don't brush it off. Do whatever is necessary to get them the help they need.
If I End Up Like Terri: An Open Letter to My Wife
Teri Schiavo's tragic death made many people think. One man reflected on his future with his wife
Where is God in the Midst of All My Troubles?
So many cry out to Him in times of need, but is God really listening? And, more important, does He care?
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