affairs
The Look of Anger
According to Webster, anger is "a feeling of displeasure resulting from injury, mistreatment, opposition, etc. and usually showing itself in a desire to fight back at the supposed cause of this feeling."
People generally express anger in three ways: confrontation, suppression and passive aggression. Confrontation involves a direct interaction with the offending person. Suppression is just that — holding anger in, which can lead to depression. Passive aggressive behavior "sneaks in the back door," lashing out at others and avoiding confrontation.
When people get angry, their heart rate and blood pressure rise, as well as their adrenaline levels. The intensity of their feelings can range from irritation to fury. These emotions and physical responses are a normal part of human nature. When left unchecked or ignored, however, anger can quickly turn from a defense mechanism to a destructive force that affects all areas of life — especially health and relationships with family and friends.
Personal background has a lot to do with how people express their anger. Were they taught that anger is a negative emotion and told to keep it inside? Did they learn to "let it all hang out"? Or did they learn to avoid taking responsibility for their emotions, saying "so and so made me feel this way"?
What is their basic temperament style? Are they more aggressive "driver" personalities, or quieter, steadier types more prone to withdrawal? Consider, too, basic gender differences. Women tend to get angry when they feel their sense of security and self-worth is threatened. Men tend to get angry when they feel disrespected and emasculated.
Such differences can cause much misunderstanding and hurt in relationships. In fact, mismanaged anger is one of the top causes of domestic violence and divorce. But there's hope. When both people are committed to recognizing and dealing with anger issues, it's possible to transform even a deeply wounded relationship.
Background Information
The Truth About Emotional Affairs
At work and online, crossing the line from platonic friendship to emotional infidelity happens at an alarming rate.
An All-Too-Common Affair
Why do so many people get trapped in affairs?
Danger Signs of an Affair
Though affairs are often unpredictable, there are recognizable symptoms of a troubled marriage.
Questions and Answers
My marriage seems beyond repair to me. My husband is running around with other women and threatening to divorce me. Is there really any hope for us?
Answer
Is cybersex "cheating"?
Answer
My husband has been having an affair for the past three months. Should I just throw my arms open and pretend the affair never happened?
Answer
Review Frequently Asked Questions
Stories
Reconcilable Differences
What's the secret to bringing a relationship back from the brink of divorce?
If you've been through a experience related to this topic, we invite you to share your story with others.Share Your Story
Other Things to Consider
A Perfect Love
After a divorce, some amount of healing can occur through community support and learning to change certain behaviors. But complete healing can only come from the one who created us.
The Freedom in Forgiveness
Sometimes the comfort of holding a grudge can blind us to the relief of letting it go.
Special Situations
Even in cases of adultery, abuse and addictions, divorce isn't always the solution.
Forgiveness: What it is and What it Isn't
Understanding and granting forgiveness can help you move past the pain of divorce.
Where is God in the Midst of All My Troubles?
So many cry out to Him in times of need, but is God really listening? And, more important, does He care?
Related Topics
Love & Sex: Dating, Living Together
Transitions: Getting Married
Abuse & Addictions: Pornography and Cybersex, Physical and Verbal Abuse
