homosexuality
Straight Talk About Male Homosexuality
Chances are, if your son starts questioning his sexual identity, you'll be the last to know. It's not something he'll likely bring up with you until after he's chosen his course. Therefore, it's important that you broach the subject before it reaches that point. Be sure to communicate the following:
Clearly define key terms. "Homosexuality" can be defined as either sexual desire toward or sexual activity with a member of one's own gender. Gays and lesbians contend that their struggle for acceptance is the same as the civil rights movement for racial equality. Wrong. This behavior is a choice. Help him understand the difference.
Point out that it's normal for people to gravitate toward friends of the same sex. Call it camaraderie or a kindred spirit. It's healthy to connect and want to spend time with same-sex friends. Having such feelings does not imply that a person is homosexual.
Make your son aware of the subtle agenda at work through characters in movies and TV shows. There's a conscious attempt by advocates of homosexuality to convince people that normal feelings about same-sex friendships are actually proof of homosexual orientation. They erroneously suggest that the earlier a person embraces their "gayness," the better. And rarely do they explore the consequences of such sin—even in this age of AIDS.
Teach your son to guard his thinking. There are two specific situations that may cause him to question his sexual identity:
- Any emotionally distressing scenario can make him vulnerable to doubt: A breakup with his girlfriend. An embarrassing situation. The death of a close friend. Abuse from a trusted adult. Tension at home. We are all susceptible to lies and tricks when we're hurting. Your son is no different. Warn him not to arrive at major conclusions while in a state of pain or distress.
- He must also be aware of something called "grooming." This occurs when another male (often several years older) befriends a boy and begins raising doubts, or even openly suggests that he may actually be gay. The attempt may or may not be premeditated, but either way, the result is a subtle indoctrination for selfish, sexual purposes.
Whether or not these situations are of immediate concern, your son needs to be aware of them. The more he knows the truth about God's divine plan for sexuality — and others' questionable intentions — the safer he will be. This can be an awkward subject to bring up, but your willingness to tackle it is extremely important.
Background Information
An Ounce of Prevention
Myths about homosexuality abound. Not least is the notion that, for some people, homosexuality is inevitable.
Born Gay?
How can you debunk the claim of biological determinism?
Struggling With Homosexuality
These questions and answers are designed to help men and women dealing with same-sex attraction work through the confusion.
The Causes of Homosexuality
Here are three possible reasons why your child is gay.
The Guilt of Homosexuality
Are parents to blame when their son or daughter comes out of the "closet"?
Questions and Answers
My friend is a lesbian, and she thinks it is okay. How do I tell her this isn't okay with God?
Answer
Review Frequently Asked Questions
Stories
Finding His Way Out
One man proves it is possible to escape the grip of homosexuality.
My Father's Closet
When Dad leaves Mom for another woman, the wounds are deep. But what do you do when he leaves for another man?
Not What I'd Expected
Having a gay father-in-law was the beginning of lessons on love and compassion amidst different beliefs and values.
If you've been through a experience related to this topic, we invite you to share your story with others.Share Your Story
Other Things to Consider
I Think I Might Be Gay!
This article, written for teen girls, points out that admiring the qualities, characteristics, or fashion sense of another female does not make you gay.
Where is God in the Midst of All My Troubles?
So many cry out to Him in times of need, but is God really listening? And, more important, does He care?
Related Topics
Relationships: Blended Families, Parents and Adult Children
Transitions: Preparing for Adolescence, Empty Nest
