health concerns
Health Problems, Hypochondria or Cries for Help?
You may at times become frustrated by ongoing physical complaints from your adolescent, especially those that sound very compelling in the morning and seem to evaporate by mid afternoon or weekends. How do you know whether to offer TLC and bed rest or to escort him out to the bus stop despite his complaints? The answer isn't always easy. More than once you may struggle with guilt after discovering he was sick after you overruled his protests and sent him to school. On other occasions, you may be compassionate in the morning, then feel like you've been had when he takes off on his bike at the end of the day.
If symptoms are frequent, ask your health-care provider to help sort things out. To get the most out of this consultation, spend time before the visit talking over the problem with your teenager, listing the problems (fatigue, headaches) and their characteristics (how often, how long, what helps, what makes it worse.) While you're at it, try to get a feel for the social weather at school, in the neighborhood, or at church. Questions with no obvious right or wrong answer ("Who do you like to hang around with?" or "What's your least favorite class?") may open the window to some current events and possibly tip you off about pressures that might be contributing to the symptoms.
Ultimately, your teen's doctor will need to ask questions, including, perhaps, a little gentle probing into the issues of the patient's daily life. If the medical evaluation uncovers a specific diagnosis, be sure that both you and your adolescent understand what should be done about it — including the parameters for going to school versus staying home. If the problem doesn't appear to be an ongoing physical illness, all of you together should develop a game plan for dealing with mornings when he doesn't feel well and agree on the ground rules for school attendance.
If you do indeed uncover personal issues that are contributing to physical symptoms, don't back away from working toward solutions. Whether it's a hard-nosed teacher, local bullies, an acute absence of friendships, or some other emotion-jarring problem, your teenager needs to know that you're on his team and that you weren't born yesterday. Making progress in one or more of these areas will usually go a long way toward shortening his symptom list.
Background Information
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Questions and Answers
I'm trying to potty train my 3-year-old son who has Down syndrome. Does he have the capacity to understand at this age, considering his challenges?
Answer
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Stories
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Other Things to Consider
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