discipline
Just a Little Respect
A few months ago when we were at McDonald's, my 5-year-old came out of the PlayPlace® crying.
"What's wrong?" I asked, assuming he must have gotten hurt.
"That boy called me stupid," he announced, a new stream of tears gushing down his face.
Before I could say anything, this same disrespectful child ran over to his table, knocking over my 2-year-old on the way. I watched, expecting him to get a stern talking to from his mom. But she didn't even stop her conversation with a friend at the next table.
Then it occurred to me: The boy had no respect for others because he'd never been taught. Be certain your child doesn't fall into that category by trying these ideas.
- Talk to your child with respect. The easiest way to teach a child how to talk respectfully is to talk to her in the same manner. Say please and thank you. Use a calm, kind voice.
- Treat your child with respect. Treat her in the way you want her to treat others. Don't grab things from her (unless there's danger of someone getting hurt). Listen actively, stopping what you're doing and looking her in the eye. If your child understands that what she has to say is important, it will bolster her self-esteem and help her to treat others appropriately.
- Teach your child how to deal with disrespect. We all have to deal with disrespect in our daily lives, so pass on your knowledge. Suggest that if the other boy can't play nicely, your child probably shouldn't play with him. Let him know that no one should make him feel like he's not important or that his feelings don't matter. And when your child is the one disrespecting others, respond swiftly and firmly. Make sure he apologizes for his transgression.
- Discipline your child with respect. Too often in a moment of frustration, we slip and forget that how we handle discipline affects our child. Acknowledge that his feelings matter, but it's your job as a parent to keep him safe and help him to become a better person. Be sure to apologize when you lose your cool. If you treat your child with kindness and love, even in times of stress, he will reflect that to the world.
Background Information
Journey of No Return
Sometimes as parents, we have a knee-jerk response to our kids as we're barraged by their numerous inquires and desires. Maybe it's time to stop being so negative.
When Not To Discipline
Parents should recognize when they should and shouldn't discipline their children.
When You Feel Like Calling in the SWAT Team
Are your children constantly testing you? This classic parenting advice will help you regain the upper hand.
Questions and Answers
After I spank my child, she usually wants to hug me and make up, but I continue to be cool to her for a few hours. Do you think that is right?
Answer
We'd like to be more unified in our approach, but how do we successfully move from two financial approaches to one?
Answer
How long do you think a child should be allowed to cry after being punished? Is there a limit?
Answer
I have never spanked my 3-year-old because I am afraid it will teach her to hit others and be a violent person. Do you think I am wrong?
Answer
It just seems barbaric to cause pain to a defenseless child. Is it healthy to spank him or her?
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Stories
If you've been through a experience related to this topic, we invite you to share your story with others.Share Your Story
Other Things to Consider
Ten Things Toddlers Wish They Could Tell You
It can do wonders for the frazzled parent to know what's going on in the mind of your little one.
Related Topics
Transitions: Having a Baby, Preparing for Adolescence
Life Pressures: Working Moms, Stay-At-Home Moms, Time for Family
Relationships: Parents and Adult Children, Blended Families
